When a human comes to accept the world as it is, is when it begins to change. As a race we are constantly reminded that change is a part of life. It is necessary to our survival that we adapt to the changes or get lost in the forward, over, out, and up motions. Judy Ruiz’s Essay “Oranges and Sweet Sister Boy”, explores the seeming impossible task of learning to embrace change. She plays with the real and surreal environments that shape her thoughts on change, and in this essay, the change of her brother’s gender.
The story of her brother’s decision to have a sex change is almost over shadowed by her intervening recollections of dreams and past experiences. She struggles to make sense of her brother’s choice by peeling back (if you will) the layers of herself. There are many ways to peel an orange, in one brave rind, or in many tiny, painful pieces. Some are fortunate enough to have the patients and skill to spare the orange the unnecessary pain. But there are also people who themselves have been broken into tiny fragments along the way of life, and do not know any other way.
Initially, Ruiz attempts to convince her brother that due to their childhood it’s natural to have sexual identity problems, although she cannot seem to convince herself of that. She talks of always hating her womanly shape, and never feeling at peace with who she was to the world. It was not until she brought a sack of oranges into a class of special needs students, that she believed the metaphor that had escaped her whole life. Upon giving the oranges to the children, expecting them to begin peeling as she explained that the orange was not unlike to world, she noticed that they refused to peel them. They were delighted at the orange gifts she had given them. “And I knew I was at home, that these children and I shared something that makes the leap of mind the metaphor attempts. And something in me healed.”
The orange is like the world in that it has a tough, bitter layer. That layer encases a sweet and rewarding inner. It takes time to be able to have the patients and skill to reach the sweet. There are many way to peel, but no matter how time consuming the method the rewards are delicious. The children, who were given the oranges, saw the orange for what it was. They did not see it as just another piece of fruit in a bowl, waiting it’d death sentence, to them it was a gift. They accepted it for all it was and for what it was not. An orange, is orange, round, and patient. An orange is not a banana and it has no rhyming partner.
This essay was written in pieces that all fit together in the end differently for different people. The message that is inescapable is that of acceptance. The last two sentences of the essay are two of acceptance, not only of her brother but of herself as the sister, “Sister, you are the best craziness of the family. Brother, love what you love.” It is not easy to be open to change constantly, to have what you know be contradicted and challenged. But upon accepting the inevitable shifting, we can begin to accept ourselves.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete